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Come to Electric Eric's Elephantastics -- for all your elephant needs!!!
CHEER in delight as your elephant squashes your neighbour's dog flat for crapping on your lawn once too often!
BE the envy of your friends as you ride an elephant to work!
FAINT in horror as your elephant craps on your lawn instead -- but nobody's perfect, right?
So come on down! Our terms are very reasonable. All our elephants pack their own trunks, and have low mileage! And remember:
(cheerful jingle; a woman sings)
Elephantastics,
We sell elephants --
(drum fill)
And that's all!
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